Luxurious Reflection: How Honey Tahini Transformed My Tutoring Practice
By Lucy Mebarki
A scattering of mixed berries, a scoop of peanut butter. Some cinnamon and freshly grated
nutmeg. And the crowning glory: a generous, unctuous dollop of honey tahini.
No, it’s not the start of a smug food blog – it’s the story of how I transformed an everyday meal
into something silky, rich and indulgent. A small but important ritual that anchors my day in
self-nurture. A message to my nervous system: You are safe. You have time. You deserve to be
nourished.
In my daily life, it’s called breakfast. In my teaching, I call it Luxurious Reflection.
I Used to Rush Everything
I used to rush through meals, treating them as an inconvenient (yet necessary) interruption to my
work day – my self-employed, school-day-compressed, housework-encroaching work day. I’d
throw something together, wolf it down, and get up to do the dishes while still chewing the last
mouthfuls. Espresso, not brewed tea.
Can’t slow down! Got to keep up the red-hot pace — but wait — somehow my time ran out and I
didn’t do all the things. Damn.
I Had Cheated Myself of the Joy of Slowness
Those days, I wouldn’t even get through my to-do list, let alone have time to reflect. No wonder I
was feeling a constant low-level anxiety, like nothing I did was ever really enough.
So how did I get off the hamster wheel?
Sugar.
I decided to finally face my horrible dependence on sugar – to regulate my energy levels and
emotions, to act as social glue. Enough was enough. I replaced my sugar-heavy, survival-mode
diet with a slower, richer, and more nourishing one.
And the strangest thing happened: not only did it improve my health, it completely transformed
my teaching.
Reflection Can Feel Like a Superfluous Luxury – But It Isn’t
The phrase “luxurious reflection” slipped out of my mouth during Qualified Tutor’s recent INSET
day, and to my surprise, it landed. I’d been talking about how we hold space in tutoring sessions –
how we give students (and ourselves) that precious time to reflect. The time that ordinary life
rarely allows.
Not cramming and shoehorning content.
But self-regulating, trusting the brain and the body to complete our necessary work – the work of
naturally bringing learning to a fruitful close.
Cramming isn’t just what students do before exams.
It’s what modern life wants us all to do.
From Slowness Comes Something Magical
The best tutoring sessions I’ve facilitated didn’t come from worshipping the Aims and Outcomes.
They came from slowness, from listening. From taking the time to prepare a warm drink and tidy
my home with gratitude beforehand. From conversations that were held and turned over like the
precious treasures they are. From starting in the sensory: nourishment, connection, breath.
These moments set the scene for the learning to unfold as a beautiful, natural, living thing.
What if Reflection Was the Foundation, Not the Bonus?
Why, then, do we treat reflection – both for ourselves and our students – as a ‘nice to have’?
Something we’ll get to after the catch-up session, the urgent email, the endless admin? How
would things change if we flipped that idea?
What Luxurious Reflection Might Look Like for Others
For me, it’s that velvety, protein-rich breakfast. (The foodie-magazine smugness I swore I’d never
embody.)
What is it for you?
● Your favourite pen and a few calm minutes of journalling before a session?
● A hot drink, sipped without multitasking?
● Stepping outside for sixty seconds and noticing the air – even if it’s raining sideways and so
grey you thought daytime had given up?
It could even be something less ‘lifestyle magazine’ and more real life – if it’s an intentional pause
or a change of pace, it counts.
I’d love to know.
Let’s Share
Let us know in the comments, or email hello@QualifiedTutor with your own ‘luxurious reflection’ moment.
We need more tutors modelling gently critical presence. And it might just start with peanut butter.